Relatives and friends play a very important role in our lives. However, it is often a destructive role (Gita 1:26,27,28,33,34). Besides relatives and friends, daily activities, business matters, services, politics or social affairs also consume tremendous amounts of our physical and mental energy. We waste a lot of time and money in activities that do not do any of us any good. Often, we get so absorbed in the "childish" activities of the world and its colorful toys that we hardly remember why we were born in the first place.

We get so entangled with all kinds of endless relationships that we often become stone-hearted in our dealings -- especially with our own selves. We often become "owners" of our spouse, children, friends, etc. We expect them to behave and deal with us the way we want. We don't give them the freedom to choose for themselves. We neither really help others nor ourselves, particularly in spirituality. That's because we fail to see God in everyone, including ourselves.

The Lord says we should always see Atman in everyone. We must serve others selflessly but never establish ownership over others or even over wealth, position or relationship through pride, ego or jealousy. We shouldn't treat anyone as a slave or become a slave of anyone or anything. The Gita gives good advice and warnings about our relationship as a spouse, child or parent: if we want to do good for everyone we love (Gita 1:1) then we must not unnecessarily interfere in their lives, thoughts and desires. We must let them be free, and unless asked, should not advise.

We must learn to trust others because by doing so, we ourselves become trustworthy. Whatever loyalty we show or make others show out of fear and threats is worthless. We should never deny freedom to others and similarly, should not allow others to deny our freedom. We must have freedom and love as the basis of all our relationships. Relationships based on passion, greed, fear, superstition and social status are selfish and narrow minded. How can we have true joy in such a life?

Life is a school, a continuous process of learning. We continuously have an opportunity to learn and teach, under every occasion or event only if we keep our "third eye" of discrimination open. Every minute, whatever happens, teaches us something for our good. It teaches us humanity above all. This world and its happenings are just a mirror in which we see our own "image."  Why blame the world -- the mirror -- for miseries that are brought on by our own selfish actions, desires, greed and pride?

So here's a resolution that each one of us should take:

"From now on, I will uplift myself as well as others to make my life and others' lives a little better. I will never hurt others."

-- Swami Radhanandaji